We’ve all seen a struggling child whether it be in public or family gathering.
We recognize that panic that screams from their eyes.
The ashen parent
We see the parent ashen with shame at her struggling child and her wish to be invisible.
For many years, and at times even now we’ve been on the receiving end of hurtful comments, unwanted stares and glares when one of my young boys were having a hard time while in public.
When Conor was small I would sit in the Paediatric waiting room at our local hospital covered head to toe in Conor’s vomit.
He found public places terrifying and his anxiety was so severe he would begin to consistently projectile vomit once I stopped his pushchair in the waiting room.
Screaming and vomiting while I tried my best not to drop my gorgeous boy, painfully aware all eyes in the room were on me and my boy.
Little autism awareness ten years ago.
Back then there wasn’t a whole lot of autism awareness or acceptance. Just stares of disgust, while I held a hysterical baby waiting to be called and kept my eyes only on Conor.
Wishing to god we could be invisible so we didn’t have to endure this terror and humiliation so openly.
It got to the stage I would bring towels to appointments and changes of clothes for myself as I would ask the doctor or nurse to hold him while I changed in front of them once our appointment was over.
You can’t imagine that level of embarrassment or humiliation until you go through it and it somehow becomes etched in your memory.
Thankfully these days the awareness raised by blogs, advocates, autistic individuals means that acceptance is more common place.
Judgement and Humiliations to endure.
There are still judgements, humiliations to endure and no doubt mothers like me are still bringing changes of clothes to appointments.
Max has another operation this coming Monday in Dublin and I am already anxious about it, the operation yes.
I am also anxious as to how he will react to a long journey to Dublin during the night and then a busy hospital full of new faces, sounds and the unexpected ❤️
In thinking of my lovely Max this evening I created this visual to highlight, there is always more to the story you see unfolding before your eyes, a struggling child deserves compassion, not stares of disgust and heartbreaking insults ❤️
Here’s to all the children who try to face the world each day, not sure of what it will say ❤️
Until next time,